Come on, admit it. Sure, it’s nice to have Barack Obama as President. But you’ve felt something missing in your life ever since we lost the daily spectacle of watching the Sarah Palin political machine attempting to manage the story that her unmarried, school-age daughter Bristol was pregnant – despite what was obviously the inherent unmanageability of the father, Levi Johnston.
So on the one hand, we were treated to photos of the happy couple (with Levi sporting a blazer, a tie and a snappy haircut), and the news that they would be getting married; on the other hand, the exquisite revelation on Levi’s MySpace page that,
I’m a fuckin’ redneck who likes to snowboard and ride dirt bikes. But I live to play hockey. I like to go camping and hang out with the boys, do some fishing, shoot some shit and just fuckin’ chillin’ I guess. Ya fuck with me I’ll kick ass.
And then Obama won and – suddenly, we were bereft.
Until now! For Levi has now declared all out war on Sarah Palin family (since you ask, no, he is no longer getting married to Bristol), by appearing on the Tyra Banks Show and then The Early Show on CBS, in each case giving it to Sarah with both barrels. According to People,
One point of disagreement: Whether Johnston, 18, ever lived at the Palin’s home. “They said I didn’t live there,” he said. “[They say] I ‘stayed’ there. I was like, ‘Okay, whatever you want to call it’ – I had all my stuff there. So, if you wanna call it staying there, that’s fine.” “So, they’re lying,” said anchor Maggie Rodriguez. “Yeah,” Johnston replied.
And Levi’s family mother Sherry and sister Mercede are getting stuck in, too. As the latter observes,
“They’re lying, trying to save themselves when they’re the ones that asked for it. They brought him to the campaign. They should have known what was coming. They can’t turn around and try and take it back now.”
Hell yeah! How do you like them family values? He warned us he’d kick ass. But for me, the real hold-the-front-page bombshell here is the one set out in the Huffington Post:
Levi Johnston, ex-fiancee of famous teen mom Bristol Palin, admitted to Tyra Banks in an interview set to air Monday that the couple was not always practicing safe sex and says they shared a bedroom on occasion.
Steady on, HuffPo. Did you have your lawyers look this over before you went to press?
As for Bristol, well, dignfied silence is the order of the day. As a statement from Camp Palin notes:
“Bristol’s focus will remain on raising Tripp, completing her education, and advocating abstinence.”
